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How To Remove the Clutter So Your Child Can Focus

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How To Help Your Child Focus

A common question asked by many parents is “how can I get my child to be focused?” Even the parents whose children exhibit focus find it necessary to continually seek new and innovate ways to help their children remain focused.

Wise parents understand now more than ever that in this instantaneous gratification – short-term attention span society – being able to focus is an invaluable quality to possess. Children who learn how to focus and remain focused today will be the leaders of tomorrow.

Block out the Clutter

There are a couple keys to being focused. An important secret is knowing how to block out the clutter. What is clutter? Clutter is everything that is superfluous. Like the word superfluous, clutter is everything that is unnecessary, everything that doesn’t matter. Anything that keeps you from reaching your goal is clutter.

Because of clutter, we often fail to focus and instead allow ourselves to become distracted. Clutter distracts us from what’s real – from what’s truly important. Clutter keeps us from establishing and striving to achieve our goals. Clutter discourages us from assessing what truly interests us and prevents us from determining if our “passion” is our purpose.

Most of us are well acquainted with clutter. Clutter says to a child things such as “you can’t”, “you won’t”, “you’re not good enough”, “you’re not that smart”, etc. Clutter befriends a parent by convincing us that our goals are beyond our reach; that our goals are too challenging; that achieving those goals would take too much time; or that our goals are only to be pursued by “young people”.

To be sure, clutter is not your child’s friend nor is clutter your sounding board. Clutter is a liar. Clutter is the Great Destroyer of Dreams and Infinite Possibilities. Clutter must be rejected by you and your child.

Be on the Look Out

Once you understand that there is clutter, you must be on constant look out for clutter. Clutter like oxygen is just about everywhere. Clutter won’t be hard to identify but early on it will challenge you as you try to reconcile its existence in your life.

Clutter is not an imaginary or mystical creature. Clutter comes from the voices – the voices of those in your crowd. Clutter is the parent who tells their child that they are too little to play. Clutter is the teacher who tells a child they aren’t smart enough to take those classes. Clutter is the counselor who encourages the child to reduce their expectations and accept a lower socioeconomic status. Clutter is the friend or family member who prefers gloom over hope anytime you dare dream or speak of doing something that improves your life.

Clutter is also produced by the person in the mirror. Yes, clutter is not only external, we create our own clutter. In fact, the clutter we create is likely the most destructive clutter of all. Internal clutter is the most deafening of all clutter. It is challenging moving away from the discouraging voices of the crowd. It is even more taxing attempting to turnoff or change the resounding track of clutter that plays in your head that keeps you from pursuing and achieving your goal.

Fortunately, where there is focus, there is hope! You can change or turnoff the track the moment you decide to let in the vision.

Let in the Vision

A mind is a terrible thing to waste. Don’t allow your child to waste their mind by getting sidetracked by clutter and failing to concentrate on what matters. Help your child develop and maintain a mental image of their dreams and goals.

There are many ways to help your child see through and manipulate the clutter. A few of the methods are as follows:

  • Construct a Visual Image – Literally and figuratively, construct something visual that will help your child stay focused. Create a collage which has words and images that remind and encourage your child. Create an oversized poster or banner that your child can see each day. Allow your child the artistic freedom to paint on one wall in their room or on the ceiling all their hopes and dreams. If it will help your child stay focused, don’t worry about the mess or the appearance. It’s worth the try.
  • Talk About Others – I don’t mean gossip or say disparaging things about people. Instead, talk about those who have achieved and had the type of success your child dreams of having. What you and your child will soon discover is that before anybody was somebody they first were nobody. Knowing the whole story about those we hold in esteem is invaluable. The history of others illuminates that the road to success is best traveled when we focus.
  • Share a Goal – There are few things that help us remain focused more than success. Sometimes all we need is the slightest amount of success to remain focused. I call those small moments of success the “Glimmer of Hope” factor. Give your child a glimmer of hope by setting aside a moment to share a goal with them – be each other’s accountability partner. Whatever you do, do not be the critical parent! By choosing not to be clutter, you will help your child set and achieve a goal. Experiencing success is a step in the right direction to helping a child become more confident and hone their ability to focus.
  • Be an Example – As it is with most things about parenting, a great way to help a child learn to focus is to be raised by a focused parent. I believe in the expression “what they see is what they’ll be”. A parent who wants their child to be focused or more focused, must be the example of focus or better yet – singled minded concentration. If you want your child to be focused on their future, you should be focused on their and your present. Your life must illustrate daily that the things you say are important are obvious by your actions. Children watch more than they will ever listen. Children know not only when you’re not focused, they know what has your attention.

In the event, I did not make it clear, asking how to get your child to be focused or more focused is a great question. Focused children are not only good for the parents, focused children are good for everyone. Focused children become accomplished adults. Focused children change the world. Without focused children there is little hope that this world can ever be a better place.

What are you doing to help your children focus? Does your life exhibit focus? Are you listening to the clutter?

About Nathaniel Turner

Nathaniel A. Turner, J.D. is the author of "Raising Supaman", a collection of life lessons written by a father to his son. Nate holds degrees in Accounting, Theology, History and Law. Nate hopes to change the world 1 Parent, 1 Child at a time.

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